Fat lazy male nurse has a piece on his blog about the things people say when they come to unscheduled care here. I thought I would throw in a story. A "gentleman" whom I knew from school days appeared and complained about his ankle that had been sore for 3 months. When I tried to find out exactly what was wrong with his ankle he insisted that I look at the other one first - the non sore one. I could not get him to understand that, a) I know what an ankle looks like, b) I was totaly unintersted in seeing either of his ankles and c) that he should not be in an A&E department in the first place.
I managed to stop him taking off his sock and shoe and told him he would be seen but was a low priority and recieved an earfull of abuse for my trouble. Upshot was one punter told politely to piss off and if he did not modify his behaviour he would be spending the night in the local jail.

Drugs

I looked after a young man who had taken something in a club - did not know what it was but he was feeling "funny" now. Tachycardic, anxious, jittery, pupils like organ stops. We looked after him on our ward overnight and I kept finding him outside having a smoke. Told that no smoking was allowed he informed me that his mother had been in our hospital with cancer and she had been allowed to smoke (?) Anyway I bollocked him (god I can be a bully at times) and told him to get back to the ward. He then complained that he had done nothing wrong!! and why was I giving him a hard time. Considering it was 3 o'clock in the morning I did not give him the slap that was my first instinct but calmly and politely informed him that if he wanted he could discuss his drug taking with the local constabulary and see if they would put up with his crap, that he had been admitted for observation and my nursing staff were unable to do this if he was not in the building never mind not in the ward.
Don't you just love nights?

Valentines day

Mrs.Grumpy excelled herself last night, slap up homemade meal to celebrate Valentines day with wine and candles. Well worth the expense I went to to get her a dozen red roses (GrumpyRN is an old romantic at heart). This will keep her safe for another year and I don't need to think about trading her in yet.

Kids

Do kids really think they can do what they like? I ask as I saw one teenager of about 14 who appeared with a teacher who stated that this little "cherub" had been assaulted on his way to school but did not know the details.
Right enough the poor lad had a sore nose and a few other bruises.
Teacher was not really saying much and on questioning the child all became clear.
Youngster was on his way to school but decided to open someones front door on the off chance he could nick something. Turns out owner of the house was home and and gave the little darling what is commonly known as a "Glasgow Kiss" plus a slap to remind him he should knock first.
Result, one chastened youngster not really hurt but with a valuable lesson in real life. I know this can sound appalling. Child abuse at it's worst, "how dare an adult lay hands on a child " etc. etc., but to me and my colleagues it was a deserved punishment of a little toerag who would have helped himself to anything he fancied. Sorry, not supposed to judge our patients.

GP's

Had a patient today sent in by GP with sore ankle, wanted it x-rayed. Patient fully weight bearing and GP had not bothered to examine ankle but sent straight to A&E. Has the GP never heard of the Ottawa rules or IRMER regulations. Patient sent home with anlgesia ice and exercises and NO x-ray.

Doctor Crippen

I see Dr Crippen is at it again, this time he is having a go at Mental Health nurses having a 2 and a half day refresher course on general nursing.
Now when I did my stint in psychiatry (a long time ago) there were some incidents where patients with a physical illness were only picked up by the students and the permanent staff did not know what was going on purely because this was so far out of their training and comfort zone. I am sure that over the years this has improved, but mental Health nurses are still not trained to primarily look after sick people and even if they are newly qualified it may have been 18-24 months since they last looked after an ill person.
You would think with this that Dr Crippen would welcome an opportunity for these nurses to refresh their knowledge, but no, he carps on about dumbing down (again) and thinks that this will make more "quacktitioners".

Madness

Friend's wife was driving home down a notorious stretch of road, flipped car and rolled several times. Thankfully everyone OK. friend found out 4weeks later she had been texting at time of accident and had been driving at 70mph with son in car. Do people never learn???

Hello

Hi to anyone who is reading this. I have just started after reading a few medical blogs and felt that some are great, some are good and others are just the ravings of deluded megalomaniacs. I hope to take this opportunity to put over the nursing side from someone who remembers the "old" days. I am that thing which some doctors seem to hate; I am a Nurse Practitioner but this will not be a "them and us" area, well it might a little bit. I just want to get things off my chest and not worry too much about grammar and/or spelling. It will mostly be about the public (bless 'em) without whom I would be unemployed, and also some colleagues will make appearances. It is really to help me de-stress.
I am not going to write every day as I don't have time but I will update it as and when.